All I heard was a 4-year-old crying hysterically on the other side of the phone. I was on a call with the father as the toddler approached him. What I heard next shocked me. The father said to his toddler, “Can you control your energy?” Sobbing, the toddler moaned “mmhmm”, then stopped crying, began giggling and ran off to play.
I’ve had the privilege of hearing that scenario play out multiple times. I’ve even heard the toddler recognize when he can or can’t control his “energy”. Now the father is telling me that sometimes the toddler does it independent of any prompting from him. I want to share with you the compliment the father told me, but first let me paint a picture for you.
My name was called. I walked across the stage to receive my business degree. As I disappeared behind the curtain at the opposite end of the stage, I extended my hand to receive handshakes from the advisors of my program. To this day, my hand remains outstretched. They refused to shake my hand. In hindsight, I do recognize that I wasn’t the model student. But I remember thinking to myself. “I’ll show them! I’ll be a leader in what I put my mind to! They’re going to want to shake my hand then!”
My parents flew from St. Thomas Virgin Islands to California to see me walk across the stage to receive my degree. And they saw me do that. That’s all that mattered. They didn’t see the rejection, I’ll walk with that alone.
I’ve also been rejected from applying my knowledge (performance psychology) within athletic departments in High Schools and Colleges. Their assumption was that I didn’t know what I was talking about and some actually tried to sully my character and expertise. But every time I’ve experienced rejection it has strengthened my resolve and sharpened my insight.
What makes a leader a leader?
Is Bill Gates a leader because he has employees/followers or because he created the personal computer first? Could it be both? What would make a person follow any other person’s perspective? When you find out the answer, please let me know.
In my connection with teams and athletes I’ve seen some go undefeated. I’ve seen some go from desiring to quit to being nationally ranked. I’ve seen others win championships. I’ve also seen some lose their games most of the times. Wins and losses are quickly forgotten; It’s always “what have you done lately,” so I tend to seek deeper meaning in my work.
According to the World Health Organization, depression is the #1 cause of disability in the world! In America, within the last 15 years, anxiety and depression have steadily been on the rise for our youth and we’ve all seen, through commercials and articles especially within the last year, how much the U.S. is attempting to shed light on the importance of mental health.
I’ve used the energy from the rejections in my life and the concerns for our youth’s future to help me create something that could be simple enough that a 4-year-old can pick it up. Increasing the coping skills of youth from a younger age by using a model that can be applied as a parenting tool is what all that passion revealed to me. I found a truth in my field of study that I’ve named The Core FOUR Sequence!
That Sequence was what the father referred to when he was parenting his kid and asked “Can you control your energy?” The father also knows that as his kid gets older he can reveal more about what the Sequence really means, and that led him to say to me, “Dude, I’m 42 years old and my kid is only 4. Because my kid understands this sequence, I know for a fact that right now, he’s at least 10-times more smart than he should be!”
That is the greatest compliment that I’ve ever heard!
People read books because the author has condensed all their years of living into a manuscript and we can learn their years of understanding in a couple of hours. The Core FOUR Sequence is the same thing; It’s hundreds of years of other people’s work that has been condensed into a model that even a 4-year-old can comprehend and put into practice.
When I heard this compliment, I had never thought about my work in that way. This Sequence is touching the next generation right now. Does that make me a leader? If you ask that father that question, the answer will be “Yes!”
Never turn away when rejected…Stay FOCUSED!! Someone else can use what comes of your perseverance!
© 2018, Ira Webbe Jr, all rights reserved